Socially complex, sad and unreasonable and illogical

The abduction, rape and murder of Jill Meagher was, and is, as socially complex as it is sad.

Steven Pinker's book
in which he uses
 statistics to illustrate
 the decline of
violence.

Reports of the event sent a decided sense of fear ricocheting throughout communities, particularly in Victoria.

As desperately sad as the circumstance is, when considered objectively, it was as rare as it is distasteful.

Whatever we might say or think, or communities are less violent now than they once were, a fact made abundantly clear by author Steven Pinker in his latest book, "Better Angels of Our Nature: Why Violence Has Declined" .

Pinker relies on the brutality of statistics to help his readers understand that in this modern era such happenings in which Meagher became sadly entangled are a rarity, while only a century ago they were significantly more frequent.

People now are, Pinker eloquently points out, far less inclined to prosecute their desires and feelings through violence than was the case.

An event such as that involving Jill Meagher is launched into the public eye through the efficiency of main-stream media and it then comes under the unblinking public gaze through the seemingly ceaseless and masturbatory-like effect of social media, all along ignoring the infrequency of such things.

The public focus on that one relatively rare event raises the spectre of violence in our communities, a menace that is unquestionably real, but one that is lessened as education increases.

The more learned people become, the more they abandon the sword and take up the word – education ameliorates aggression.

Many have marched in memory of Meagher and that deserves applause, but their energy should not simply dissipate on the streets, rather be the beginnings of push to enhance the broader decency of our communities.

In taking Meagher’s life, the perpetrator stole not only her future, but along with that a sense of trust among people, even those geographically remote from the Sydney Rd incident.

Some women have already talked about the insecurity they now sense in certain situations and others have said that there are some parts of Shepparton they once avoided if possible, but now they most certainly will.

That I understand, but accepting the realities of life and being prepared to consent to statistics illustrated by Pinker, their concern is unfounded.

The expression of one fellow’s fantasies impacted not only those immediately involved, but filtered throughout the community to damage everyone, regardless of gender.

Women are nervous and men, whoever they are, carry the guilt, even though that is both unreasonable and illogical.

The manifestation of what happened on Brunswick’s Sydney Rd early on that September Saturday morning is many faceted, but among the legacies is an increase in the distrust between men and women.

A simple event, an irrevocable change

A friend often talks about how the simplest of events can irrevocably change our lives. 

Flowers gather on the
Sydney Rd footpath
where Jill Meagher
was last seen by CCTV
cameras.

Should we pause for a few moments, he argues, to say “hello” to a friend we have actively, but not consciously, re-shaped our lives.

That brief stop for what was a seemingly innocuous chat shifted our lives from one paradigm onto a wholly new footing with new horizons opening and some hopes and dreams closing down.

That is, granted, somewhat dramatic, but when considered analytically, it is true.

Life, no matter how hard you might try to control it or comply with your hope and dreams, or respond to other yearnings, there is a rogue randomness about our lives.

A few seconds spent talking with a friend folds almost invisibly into our lives and beyond the relative importance of the exchange, it is not seen, mostly, as having any significant relevance to how our lives are evolving.

Examples of life’s randomness abound with the most recent being the abduction, rape and murder of Melbourne ABC reporter, Jill Meagher, on Saturday morning.

Jill Meagher - witty
and intelligent.

That random event began seemingly innocuously and ended in a rather grisly way – desperately sad for Jill Meagher, her family, friends and workmates, and in what must have been a fleeting opportunistic decision, the perpetrator’s life changed forever.

Considering such moments in life, we can all torture ourselves with a million “what ifs”, but that will not do any good for as a friend told me years ago what is “is” and cannot be changed regardless of hope, prayers or actions.

The randomness of life is non-negotiable.

Interestingly it is something we cannot avoid, we can twist, turn, manipulate, take this or that stand, but never can we divorce randomness from our lives, but importantly, and strangely, it is that randomness that brings life fully alive.

Blandness awaits those who attempt to remove randomness from their daily affairs and sidestep its impact and even worse it can bring on a noticeable neurosis that can manifest itself in ways that play out in moments such as those on Brunswick’s Sydney Road on Saturday morning.

Of course the mysterious randomness of life does not always necessarily lead to grim or bad moments for equal to those who can point to difficulties; tragedy and disaster are those who can illustrate happenings that were happy, enlightening and rewarding.

Random and unplanned moments have led to wonderful life-long relationships, business successes, and serendipitous discoveries for which no-one can take responsibility short of saying that “they were in the right place at the right time.”

Of course, there is the opposite and what apparently began as a simple event for Jill Meagher changed her life irrevocably.